Just an update, the ring is on its way back to us, should be here some time this week. FedEx told us to pay the customs because Indonesian customs is known to take 6 months with any disputes, and they charge you a very large storage fee, so even if you win, you end up paying as much if not more then the original fee. Also, they tend not to let any one win a customs fee dispute, so we would have ended up owing the customs for both the customs fee and storage fee. I am past the crying and anger stages and have reached the acceptance stage. The good thing is that FedEx is going to charge our account for the Indonesian customs fee and then bill us at the end of the month. This will let us budget and figure out a way to pay it off.
I just want others to hear my story so they are more careful then we were and don't ship any thing right away and get burned the same way we did. The sad part is I have been getting email after email from both sellers and buyers, who have been taken for on eBay. We are not going to be selling any thing on eBay again. I could write a "How to use eBay to steal 101" book with all the information I have found out. I may do a blog, not to help thieves but to help people from being taken in by the con-artists. What got me the most is not the number of people who have been taken, but by the fact that there is nothing we can do once it happens. The police cannot help, eBay and Paypal will not help because they can not afford to become responsible for this. There must be some way to protect people, but I don’t know what it is yet. If you have some idea of how to make it harder on thieves please let me know.